Tuesday, April 29, 2008
I'm trying my best to post at least once a week and my down time waiting for the rest of the entourage to arrive at the gym is a good time. Unfortunately I have to post frm my phone so it's slow and potentially typo ridden.
So when does it get easy? "It" refers to daily life. Yes, I realize that's a ridiculous question with an obvious answer of "never". What I mean is, when do the big issues in life quit popping up? Little day to day things like bad traffic or a rude cler in the market don't bother me. Those are just moments in time and are finished as soon as the start. The "it" I'm talking about are the big issues that really define a life.
Instead of speaking esoterically (I always hated that language) I should just say that we at my house are dealing with Jayson's depression again. After having it in small doses at low levels for years he went int a tailspin with it about this time last year and it continued for most of the rest of 2007. Around christmas he seemed to have snappedout of it and was his usual friendly happy self. However, since about February he's been going downhill again. When it started I remember thinking "I thought I'd have more of a break than this." Unfortunately it's continued to get slowly worse until this last week when it got drastically worse.
This is where I wonder when it gets easy. I thought we had things under control but apparently we don't, and that's concerning because I'm not sure what to do next. J is in his very early 40's and I will be 40 this year, and we'll have bee together 11 years as of May. I thought at this stage we'd pretty much have our routine figured out but in spite of our best efforts the universe keeps us guessing. We purposefully changed our routine by adding Anthony but that has been a good ting and he's been a big help, plus he's pleasant to have around.
So I'm not sure I have a point here other than just doing a brain dump. I'm wondering how crazy this will all sound, but what the hell. I keep hoping that as I get older and (hopefully) wiser that things in life will make more sense and be easier. Maybe I'm naive but I'm I still think that it should all be easier. If the universe and the gods are willing, it will be so in the near future.
Posted by Grrrowler at 17:25
Friday, April 25, 2008
Thursday, April 24, 2008
To keep this post even remotely interesting, here's another picture of the inside of the convention center taken with my crappy camera phone. I need to find something new to take pics of while I wait.
Posted by Grrrowler at 17:06
This is a rather discouraging and depressing story. I'm not sure I understand the idea of giving up because something hasn't been found yet. It seems as if that is precisely the reason research should continue. People have been searching for a cure for cancer for decades but haven't given up merely because one hasn't been found yet. Not every attempt is going to be successful but that doesn't mean that the next attempt won't be. The HIV researchers where I work decided to use the failure of the Merck study as motivation to continue their efforts, not as an excuse to quit.
Incidentally, a friend of mine was involved in the Merck study in SFO and found out after it was shut down that he was given the vaccine instead of the placebo. He was counseled after the study ended that he is now more at risk of contracting HIV than before. When he and I talked about it he said that even knowing what he knows now about the increased risk he's at, he would do the same thing again.
I've said for years that I'll be surprised if there ever is a "cure" for HIV/AIDS. Years ago it stopped being a disease to a lot of people and became an industry. The amounts of money involved in research and being given to the pharma companies is far too great to suddenly have it shut down if a cure is found. I suppose it's that way for many illnesses these days...
Posted by Grrrowler at 14:33
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Posted by Grrrowler at 17:15
As usual, it was a busy weekend, but it was about fun this time. In honor of Anthony's birthday (he's 37 in case anyone is interested) we took him for a surprise visit to the Olympic Peninsula. Having grown up in western Washington he has seen surprisingly little of the area, but we're changing that. We had told him we were going to go across the Sound for dinner and then come back across on the ferry and spend the night on our boat in Edmonds. It made logical sense as the ferry to Edmonds lands about 1/4 mile from where we keep our boat. Instead we had plans to drive to the north end of the peninsula where we had a waterfront cabin reserved for the weekend. Thanks to darkness and the winding roads leading to the place, he never suspected a thing. When we arrived at the cabin, he still though we were heading to the ferry. How he thought he the ferry would down a small gravel road I don't know, but he was too tired to question it I guess.
The cabin turned out to be even better than we expected. We were truly right at the water's edge and it was nicely secluded. We had a beautiful view out all the windows. Sadly we didn't get to spend much time outside like we had hoped for. It snowed off and on most of the weekend, which is unusual for this part of the state, more unusual at sea level, and even more unusual in late April. I thought the weather was pretty darn cool and loved it. It was a bit of a surprise waking up to 4 inches of snow on Sunday morning but it made for a pretty scene.
To entertain ourselves we ate a lot, did some sightseeing, ate a lot more, and just vegged a good deal of the time. We even had a rousing game of Scrabble on Saturday night. Sunday after we left the cabin we stopped in Port Townsend to play tourists again, then caught the ferry to Whidbey Island. We drove north to Deception Pass and did some light hiking around there before heading down to Clinton to catch the ferry back to the mainland. We covered a lot of ground that day and it sure felt like it. Back in Seattle we ended the weekend with a nice dinner at an Italian restaurant near home.
I was really glad we were able to do something fun and different for Anthony's first birthday with us. He seemed to really enjoy and appreciate it, and that was the most important part. I'll post an album in the next day or two but for now here's a sample pic of where we stayed.
Posted by Grrrowler at 15:30
Thursday, April 17, 2008
I'm sitting in the convention center waiting for Anthony to show up for the gym. The gym is on the ground floor and I'm on the top floor. I'm amazed as I look out the windows what a pretty city Seattle is. I'm overlooking a busy freeway but there are hundreds of trees around me still. I've got a cup of tea that the guy at Tully's gave me for free and I'm enjoying just relaxing for a while. Other than the uncomfortable chair and the woman by the window reading christian bible verses to someone on her mobile phone, it's a nice relaxing time.
Posted by Grrrowler at 17:16
I've been trying to make it a regular habit of going to the gym lately, and so far I've been successful at it. Two of my friends were members of Gold's so Jayson and I joined that gym so that the four of us could go together. A few weeks ago we signed Anthony up on our plan (after straightening out our screwed up membership) so that he could go with us, or more so that we could go with him since he already had a regular routine. So, the plan was for Anthony, Jayson, me, and our two friends to go regularly. Sadly it's been a bit like herding cats to get everyone there at one time. Tonight four of us were scheduled to go and for various (valid I might add) reasons, it's down to two of us. In any event, I'm enjoying getting to the gym and am already seeing a little progress in myself here and there, which is exciting. Now I just have to keep it up...wish me luck.
Posted by Grrrowler at 16:04
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Update: I just realized it's not Thursday, it's Wednesday...dammit!
I keep thinking I'll post more regularly on here, but despite my best intentions, I just don't. So, here I am again more than a week after the last of anything was posted here. I'm wondering if both people who read this are still paying attention...
I should have lots to report after a week, but sadly I don't. Work has been pretty busy, and I'm liking it. I have a lot more motivation when I have a list of things to do, and that's how it's been lately. I've been getting lots done and that sure makes the days go faster.
So at home it's also been busy, but a good busy. We started spring cleaning a couple of weekends ago but then got sidetracked. So now the house is messier than it was before we started. Something ain't right with that. We WILL be getting back to it very soon, hopefully weekend after next. We've got to clean out three more closets plus the loft space in our master bedroom closet. I expect to end up with a large collection of stuff to give away, which always seems to be the case. I always feel like some sort of pressure has been released when I get rid of the accumulated junk in the house.
This weekend is Anthony's birthday. We're going to be spending the weekend away from home, but I won't expand on that any further in case he's reading this. Anthony made his debut on the site when I posted pics of our Leavenworth, WA trip a few weekends ago, but I didn't mention anything about him, other than his name and the fact he was there. So, I figured I'd expand more on what his story is. We've known him a few months now and in that time he very quickly moved from acquaintance to friend to, well, boyfriend. We are officially what some refer to as a "thruple", which I frequently call a "trio". Yes it's a non-traditional relationship, but we're two gay men who consider our dog and cat our "kids" so we already had a good head start on non-traditional. Why not take it a step further? In reality, it's a nice thing. Neither Jayson nor myself has any immediate family within 300 miles, and most are much further away than that. When it takes a full day of travel to visit any family member, it's hard to feel very close or involved in each other's lives. We've talked about the idea of creating a larger family ourselves, and that is really what we're doing. We've got a couple of close friends who are family in their own right, but having someone else at home takes it to another level. I read somewhere that a thruple gives twice the sex with six times the emotional baggage, but that negative assessment isn't true so far for us. It's nice having someone else around the house, someone to help out with household chores, and someone to help when Jayson's depression becomes an issue. It's also nice to have yet one more person to share happy times and new experiences with, and another person to love and take care of, and do the same for both of us. So, that really is the biggest news around here lately. I'm liking how it's going so far.
Back to this weekend (wow, that paragraph took a left turn), I think we'll all have fun and Anthony will enjoy himself. Jayson and I are hoping to make it a good birthday for him, and I think we will.
We're still looking forward to our camping trip in May. My only concern is how much it's going to cost in gas to get from here to Yellowstone pulling a trailer. Last time I filled up it cost about $80 to fill my truck from empty, and gas prices have gone up again in the last few days. I'm hoping that pulling a trailer on the highway will give me roughly the same mileage as when I'm driving around town, but I have visions of us not getting to Snoqualmie pass (50 miles) before we have to fill up again (26 gallons). Only one way to find out I guess!
Posted by Grrrowler at 19:52
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
Consistently bad, but that should count for something. It seems to me that people with no discernible musical ability just shouldn't make music videos. More from the embarrassingly bad McCain Girls.
Update: This vid has been yanked due to copyright infringement. Ooops.
Posted by Grrrowler at 09:15